lyrics

LENGTHS

find me at a new low
thought I’d never reach this point alone
behaving up to certain lengths
at the time it seemed like I’d be fine
cause leaving up to now
would be honest how?
couldn’t count the times i’ve
found myself lacking
cause
our love
all the things that I want
vs. all the things that i’ve left behind
our love
believing maybe that once
I could be myself and it’d be alright
imagined life on better terms
never thought it through that far
moving on the worst times
own what hurts and try to make it mine
cause leaving up to now
would be honest how?
couldn’t count the times i’ve
found myself lacking
cause

COMPLETE

even if I wanted
to lay around another
it’d be hard to find one worth waiting for
bled for what it’s worth
pled so long for something to happen
and now suddenly we’re all alone
complete
this is completely yours
complete, and I’m
feeling like
I didn’t settle for once in life
fled from pain a hundred times before
led myself astray just out of spite
yet I’m feeling like
even I wanted
to cum around another
it be hard to find one worth kneeling for
weighed for all I’m worth
pray there’s pride or value in nothing
and yet suddenly we’re all alone
complete
this is completely yours
complete, and I’m
feeling like
I didn’t settle for once in life
fled from pain a hundred times before
led myself astray just out of spite
yet I’m feeling like

FAMILIAR

sheer enough
so I can’t think
about how I could
be on the wrong side
leave out, all the things I wanna say
cause you make me feel over familiar
maybe it’s wrong to decide
what should be demonized
repent, our flesh was never innocent
your thighs make me feel over familiar
sheer enough
so I can’t think
speak of all the things I’d lay down
just so, I could plead my innocence
as you let me get over familiar
maybe it’s wrong to decide
what should be demonized
repent, our flesh was never meant for this
yet still makes me feel over familiar
I’ve never not felt
like things should
have gone further
breathing you in
can’t imagine
me harder
hands on your chest
there’s some weight
to believe in
right on the cusp
of a moment
I’d live in
maybe it’s wrong to decide
what should be demonized
repent, our flesh was never innocent
your thighs make me feel over familiar

EXPECTATION

torn out of comfort
thrown into life
lean on the hope of
leisure that’s
honest
think about how all this time
what i expected from myself
dread the thought of all we’ll find
if you go reaching in that darkness
breathing you in
was the surest sign
that even your scent
could make me feel
honest
i wanted that and so much more
won’t accept that i lost out
it hurts to think that all i’ve felt
was only leading me nowhere
the expectations of
2 bodies gliding in the dark
the expectations of
what I imagined from the start

THIN

that the build of another
could set me off
seeing your not enamored
after all my work
is hurtful
so I’m thin
carving absence
and to think
this would stop me from feeling awful
can I trust the figure
I’m sculpting?
I crave a new chance
in better light
pray that watching my intake
will someday feel
normal
so I’m thin
carving absence
and to think
this would stop me from feeling awful
can I trust the figure
I’m sculpting?

HONEST

longing left to much to the mind
leaving out what’s right
so I took it on the side
and
couldn’t reign in this desire
need to feel the weight
now I’m nothing all the time
how bad does it seem?
you don’t have to be honest
the thought that maybe once was nice
but twice would be divine
is what started my decline
and
I just wanted to reconcile
the past that got me off
with the present I’m just dying in
how bad does it seem?
you don’t have to be honest

FOREVER

living uncertain
revealing an offer
it only makes sense
that you’d want some answers
ay yeah, when I hardly listen to reason
my only thoughts are how to
keep you from leaving
can’t remember a time
when I didn’t feel awful
but I guess being awful
begets being awful
ay yeah, when I hardly listen to reason
my only thoughts are how to
keep you from leaving
it’s so hard
believing
there’s nothing more
I could do
Forevers
a long time
to spend hurting for you

STABLE

decide in life
what’s worth the pain and regret
for leaving light in spaces
best left unlit
cause
truth only hurts
claim just a touch
and I’m in deep
admit it’s wrong
that spite only drives me more
in the end
are we stable?
(couldn’t feel I’m more alone in this)
cause I’m falling
(the truth’s awful)
believe a standard sets
me apart from all I am
cleave into what stands for
love of lust spent
cause
truth only hurts
claim just a touch
and I’m in deep
admit it’s wrong
that spite only drives me more
in the end
are we stable?
(couldn’t feel I’m more alone in this)
cause I’m falling
(the truth’s awful)

PROMINENCE

leave me out till I decide
to think about pain honestly
recoiled at any sense of slight
as I pruned away at decency
leave out what we knows right
leave you gagging on my ecstasy
prove somehow I’ve grown despite
all the evidence
spent the best of my time
won’t believe it
pressed against that basement wall
could I say all I wanted
think of you as an alter
what could I hope to offer
seen life on the other side
now I need it
I still see my hands on you
revealing all that I’ve needed
think of you as an alter
what could I hope to offer
hope to offer
lust


eh yeah, do wanna
live for fun?
or hurt like you
say you wanna
crouched in dirt
and all i do
i see it in itself
if to try made sense
then i’d lose what i’d left
but only on the outside
i’ll show up, i’ll show
eh yeah, think of
water in a fall
last i saw
lust spoke
louder than words
dawn’s weak song
we could but wouldn’t sing
made love in the sense
that life means less than we think
but only on the outside
i’ll show up, i’ll show
blinded by urges
to salacious to be heeded
and I’m blinded by longing
but what more could i need
in your eyes


messiah


certain times
i know it seems like honest rings slow
and then deciding on the next call
i’ll admit at times it gets low
always asking “is this enough?”
offer, is that your only offer?
some try harder ,
but not for lack of options
to take side’s
you know it seemed like honest felt cold
and in this i found a worst life
try hard to mask just what i came for
always asking “is this enough?”


faithless


left side
of my mind
lets me know that
outs the only option
if i want
what you want
it’d hurt now
but only on the outside
if i fall
then at least i fall
if i fold
then at least i fold
dull side lines
chance to feel it
awful, now not bad
take a seat for…
lost time to
won’t ease down now
maybe faithless
right side
of my mind
lets me know that
in’s the only option
i’ll want
what i want
it’d hurt now
but only on the inside


tolerance


wrong about it now
and i’ll be wrong about it later
to be walking out on someone
who feels we just can’t be apart
picking at the bones of
lovers ever since i left them
and I’m sucking at the marrow
like it’ll maybe win back some hearts
think about how I’m so hard
when can i take all the things
i want from you?
and i dream about how you’re so soft
laughing off the things
i want to do to you
excuse my personal failures
when I’m all alone
and these urges won’t help themselves
do to you
excuse my personal failures
and my faults
let’s not talk about my faults
we can speak about it now
or we can fume about it later
bringing up the past and present
trying so hard to relate them and
I’m weaker by the second
and what’s love without the power
seeing lack of resolution
waving in a stop before we start


elite


couldn’t see how it’s not our fault
and when i know it looks like
lies won’t help here
worn out since that night
cause i could never come off
like i wanted
so out of tune with what i want
could have said that’s
exactly what you needed
instead, got so hung up
that it seemed like
it came off like whatever
oh, i see you on it
yes, i see you on it
say i threw you on it
oh, i do ah
see, how i feel you on it
yes, i feel you on it
say, i feel you on it
oh, i do ah
pale white
displaying
what i want from life
is smooth and parted
whole life
believing
what you’ve got’s elite
and now i’m on it
every time think before “I”
only to say “let’s just cum”
and to think I’ve been there before
who would believe it?


talent


a colorful mind, ha
most times will take you so far
but when it comes to head
well, so far lasts only so long
leaving out some details
save another night from ruin
and less and less excited
to see the face i thought
could prove love
looked as good as it felt
i’ll take less on the side
i want to see it
block out time
so I’m closer to you
if i don’t decide
i want to be there
i want to be there
it’s fine
thin is all i wanted
and all i’ve ever needed for thrills
and looking good on descent
it takes talent
amusing at times and
i’ll admit i’ve enjoyed your jest
but what’s entertaining or
worth explaining about shrewd flesh
ribs, i like to see them
their all i’ve ever needed to feel
and smiling
while i repent(oh god)
it takes talent
and the rest they hold on
to a life they can’t live
to feel sorry for
(failing, to see it)
and i rather not know
but let’s try and see just
what we’re cum-ing for
(leave it, it’s over)
the only offer i got
was for forever and
i just wasn’t interested
(desperate, believing)
the taste of others
on my lips never since lifted
it became everything i was
living for
(living, too easy)
passing on a good person
oh, and I’m staring
down your shirt now
asking you about bland things
oh, don’t go ruin
what i’ve worked for


hurting


the fun of want ruined by having
let me go with total silence
no comfort having say in something
when something said I’d fall behind and
pulled aside
hesitate to calm another
older tomes
reluctant to forgive each other’s volume
but only on the side
(will i take your hand)
will they understand
(if i take your hand)
hurting for a chance
say it’s only us that stayed in
only doubt when undecided
face down on the floor, excited
finding faith in blind decision
pulled aside
hesitate to calm another
older tomes
reluctant to forgive each other’s volume
but only on the side
(will i take your hand)
will they understand
(if i take your hand)
hurting for a chance
false idols
honest in a way i know
i won’t fight it
decide on if i’ll look or show
say it’s only us
say you wanna cum
face down on the floor
just to take my hand
but only on the side
(will i take your hand)
will they understand
(if i take your hand)
hurting for a chance
(to take your hand)
first of many
left out, judged and loathed
i full pouted
denied them
based on looks alone


tradition


send out word for me
undecided
hard to promise
when my only thought’s on riding
known to saddle
on that thought I’ll
hold out for the one night
you decide to
fall on me
matching our strides
time will tell
if it means something
take me in
swallow it whole
gauge your time
your throats entitled
eh?
phone it in, lay there
disappointed
can’t help but feel
tension there between us
thin and so still
clutched in silence
break it softly
break it so you can
all the fun of above
tradition
leaving out the love
tradition


presence


this side of hate
seems just like the other
all the time it takes
is it worth the bother?
would you go
farther, is it even an option
farther, lack any insight
if you take out of fear
it’d leave me with nothing
and to break from faith
it would seem unlikely
that you’d go
farther if thats the only option
farther, lack of any hope or want
forget the tome
leave it untied on the alter
forgive the tome
save the scorn solely for the author
say it’s over
hurt till november
say it’s over
never see december
this side of hate
stings just like the other
all the time it takes
is it worth the bother?
would you go
farther, is it even an option
farther, lack any insight


influence


i cite you as my main influence
and all this time
it may have seemed
this work was born from just one mind
I’ve said it in the heat of the moment
also alone just tugging
joylessly all by myself
thinking of you
and you’ve been my main preference lately
all this time
it may have seemed
my patience would have thinned by now
but numbers on your shape and your distance
on paper come together making something
that i can’t turn down
to cum into you
don’t say it alone
and lose the right
hurting for days
just like you do


consensual


followed, you down
to stare up at your ceiling
fawning, over your shape
without the feeling
higher, just close your eyes
i’m not worth seeing
tighter, the time spent
has been so pleasing
in my eyes
it seems like hands are always failing
to reach the point where
the night gets to revealing
we ought to know
where our hands could be right now
consensual